People on Facebook scare me.
I have experience where people can be different online and on the real life. I once knew a girl who was also a musician in the city and although we didn't really know each other personally, we know that we're in the same community. Also we met sometimes in concerts that I organised. She used to send me messages through Facebook asking a lot of stuff. I happily answered them because she was so nice and very supportive of my work. Once I told her about the obstacles I have and he sent me "a warm, big hugs and a lot of kisses to make me feel better". I was moved. Until I actually held a conversation with her.
At that time she enrolled in one of the music camps and before the camp started, I used to hold a briefing for all the participants. When she came I had recalled how nice she was on Facebook so I was greeting her with warmth and friendliness but her replied froze me. She was cold and distant and didn't seem to have any recollection whatsoever about our conversation online. I had thought maybe she just had a bad day, but after a week, she didn't change. And she was the same with everyone at the camp.
It didn't traumatise me, but after that incident I certainly don't form opinion as quickly as I was before about people I met online. I would wait until I shake their hands in person in real life. Flesh and blood.
That was 4 years ago.
Now, people are worse. It's a whole new game out there and I wonder how people got super ugly these days. What happened to good manners, honesty and sincerity?
I happened to know a guy, let's say A, who told my BFF something bad about someone else (also a guy I knew, let's say B). It was not only unpleasant but also strange as he was telling this story in front of a bunch of people. We couldn't really know for sure if it's the truth but even if it did, he sounded like he was about to smear someone's reputation. Why would you do that? We decided that maybe something happened between them and A got so angry.
But a while after that, I started seeing A following B on Facebook, liking his posts, making friendly comments, as if they were buddies. A also told me that he's been consulting B on some matters, asking his expert opinion, and recently we spotted them together in a concert, sitting next to each other and chatting friendly. It was so disturbing.
I also find strange nowadays that people can hate someone so much in the real life but liking their posts on Facebook or making supportive even admiring comments. I had many cases where I met with a friend who later told me how so and so made him/her absolutely crazy with their behaviour but on Facebook they seem on friendly terms. Seriously, what is going on? Is this some new game that people play?
My other BFF told me not to worry. She said she has found that long ago. In the military world where she lives, the beaureaucracy and the strata have somehow forced people to show their support through this 'like' button especially to someone important because they're in the more inferior position and this small, petty, insignificant gesture could prove to be helpful in their career. She said she got used to that and she simply tags the people she thinks are fake in her mind and just acts more careful around them.
So, has the 'like' button become some sort of political button these days? It looks to me that people don't just like something in pure terms like how people like a certain food because it's yummy, but because they also want to support someone, they want to be a part of their society, they want to be seen as their follower, or whatever reasons that suited their own intentions. I'm not saying it's bad. It's totally fine. What's awful is when they can't actually stand the real person and even go so far as to destroy someone's name.
It honestly scares the hell out of me. These days I'm using Facebook just to get in touch with someone and post work-related publicity, but otherwise I'd rather spend more time doing concrete, tangible things like reading or practicing. It's less crowded, and sometimes lonely, but at least it's real.
